I’m having a hard time

So I’ll just be real – I’ve been a spoiled child/ adult at home my whole life. I’ve gone to Disneyland at least twice every year since 2006-2007 (even if it was literally a one day trip last year to make the second), I’ve also been on two Disney cruises, two Walt Disney World trips, and once to Aulani. (Not counting non Disney vacations.)

Now, I’m in no position to go anywhere right now unless my parents are feeling particularly generous. I’m paying at least part of my own trip to anywhere, which is totally fair. And I’m nowhere near being able to really go anywhere right this second even without a pandemic (at least not without my parents’ scorn lol)

So I find myself looking at these pictures of “socially distanced characters”, “cool off/ eating areas”, knowing not all the food places are open in WDW and asking myself the important questions such as “Will there be Jack Jack num num cookies in Disneyland?” (We know Dole Whip is covered from WDW).

And I’m just wondering…. if after years and years of normal vacations, FINALLY meeting Hercules (my favorite), at the 90s party… if spending all that money is truly worth it right now. You can’t even smile in pictures (sans masks) in WDW! (Seriously, I know we need to prevent germ spread but no one said that out loud before enforcing it or they would’ve heard it too.)

I know I’m certainly not spending thousands to fly to Florida, but I wonder – is this just the new normal… forever? Do we no longer have full use of our faces? Will my niece, who will be born in September, not know a world where she can hug characters? See concerts/ any large events?

Will I never achieve my last remaining goals at Disney – to kiss my love (whom I don’t have right now) in front of the castle, have a proper proposal/ marriage ceremony there?) [See masks in all photos.] (When is it even okay to know if you can go on a date and start rounding the bases anymore – to begin with.)

Or am I overreacting completely? America’s response has been so poor, not even our brightest scientists seem to be able to help. I know there are worse things to be concerned about – my jobless state one of them I content with daily, but these personal struggles, of not knowing if I am indeed to late to be married since it didn’t happen pre pandemic, and if I have hugged Mickey for the last time, weigh equally as the dire economic status I am technically in, but live at home to avoid the ramifications of, as so many do.

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